desperate for change

Did anybody watch Google World on CBC?

If you follow the online grapevines and feeds, there would be nothing in this documentary that would be particularly shocking or new. In fact I would say that quite a lot of it is just old news. However, I did find the part about the beginnings of the company interesting. Upon discovering that they had the magic formula for determining search relevance using a system cobbled together with spare computers and cheap parts, it was a matter of going all out and taking the idea to the end.

For the true academic, he or she might have been satisfied with publishing a paper and getting a PhD. Fortunately for Larry and Sergey (and fortunately for users of Google today), they set out to see how far the rabbit hole goes.

“I think to build a great company you need to have a well defined hypothesis based on a theory for a market’s evolved future. And I think the most effective way to enter that market is to build a company like a scientist testing the theory. As an experiment.”
-Dustin Curtis on The Science of Entrepreneurship

At the heart of all entrepreneurial efforts are experiments to test out different kinds of theories: Can I provide something of value? Can I build it with a minimal defect rate? Are there people interested in what I am offering? Can I make money out of this (which in Google’s case wasn’t even an issue at the beginning!)?

I have followed some rabbit holes in my days – going to grad school, starting new hobbies, online dating, starting a blog. Some have turned out to be more interesting than others. If I give some advice to a younger Alfred – go down rabbit holes, and don’t be afraid to go all the way to the end; who knows maybe a Wonderland of some kind is at the bottom.

(PS – I originally came across Dustin Curtis’s blog and essays through Hacker News. There is a Seth Godin-ness about the writing, if you enjoy that kind of thing.)

It was recently pointed out to me the irony of the title of my blog.

“If you are so desperate for change, how well do you respond to other people trying to change you?”

This was particularly in the context of your significant other.

This is obviously a delicate question. The fact is – I don’t respond very well at all.

The hardest thing in the world to do, is to change somebody. For myself, I automatically detect the change attempt and all kinds of defense mechanisms kick in. As a kid, I hated being told what to do and would prefer to do things myself.

However, there are some legitimate changes that I actually want to do with myself. I have a bunch of “New Year’s Resolutions” that I keep up to date all throughout the year. Wouldn’t someone reminding me about them help me carry these items out?

Ultimately the motivation must come from the inside, not externally. Otherwise, your will to follow through will stop once someone stops reminding you. In fact, you may become annoyed with this person, even though he or she is really trying to help you.

If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.

(That’s a quote from the author of “Le Petit Prince“, Antoine de Saint-Exupery.)

You have to do a root cause analysis to get to your rational for doing what you want to do and change things from the inside out. This is what Anthony Robbins refers to as changing what we link to pain and pleasure. As long as eating junk food gives you pleasure, no amount of nagging will make you think otherwise. Instead, you must link pleasure to eating healthy and link pain to junk food which is filling up your body (or your temple) with filth and garbage.

But back to the original topic – of how I should respond to someone trying to make a change in me. I think that it is important to open your ears to listen (which I do). Then it is necessary to internalize what was said and see if it converts into action.

Easier said than done, haha…

A lot of my techie friends and co-workers are disappointed with the iPad. They were hoping for a MacBook with the keyboard trimmed off; not a giant sized iPhone.

In case you haven’t seen it, here is a more passionate response: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQnT0zp8Ya4

Mark Cuban has a very different point of view of the device than anyone I’ve seen. Rather than whining about the shortcomings, he is able to see all kinds of possibilities. Okay question – for those of you who have young children, are you giving your kid your iPhone to play with while you are busy pushing the grocery cart at Safeway? I have seen this before not just at the store but also in restaurants – as something to keep the kid occupied. Parents are willing to spend spend spend when it comes to improving the lives of their kids. Perhaps there is something here.

Let us step back for a second: the techies see this as a disappointment, yet Mister Cuban is able to look at the possibilities. Is this the difference between the average person versus someone who is a successful businessman?

As a nerdy geeky techie, we (and I specifically) are more naturally comfortable with factual things. We are most comfortable with one point of view of the world – our view. In order to go beyond, we need to be able to see things from more than one point of view. Specifically, it is precisely when you are feeling negative about something, that is when it is the best time to try on the “Yellow Hat“.

I was in the UBC BizzComm Club back when I was doing my masters and there was a seminar offered where the Thinking Hats system was introduced to us. We actually tried out the different “Hats” and tried to see something from the different point of views. It was interesting how some people’s opinions were so strong and entrenched that they were not giving all the hats a fair chance – in particular the “Yellow Hat” of positive points, when they have already decided on the opposite point of view.

Being objective is easy – because you are dealing with facts. But being able to force yourself to try out different points of view just for the sake of seeing things differently – it is truly a challenging exercise. If you weren’t thrilled about the iPad, can you think of something positive about the product in ways that it can make your life better? What ideas do you have about the iPad when you have the Yellow Hat on?

I came across this particularly insightful essay entitled “Social tips for geeks.” I am not insulted at all because this is something I can improve on. In fact, I am quite surprised at the accurate observations.

I love item #4.

Try to talk as little as possible, and when you do speak, only ask superficial questions

Given how I feel about small talk, I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to do it just to make everyone feel comfortable. Especially when I bump into the sales guys in the office kitchen.

I don’t think that I was always like this. I swear I was much friendlier and outgoing back in high school than I am these days, despite my nerdy interests like reading, computers and chess. Somewhere along the way I developed this mildly anti-social interaction patterns.

By the way if you enjoyed that particular essay by the author Philip Guo, he has a whole bunch of other wonderful gems:

Attention: Overbearing Asian Parents – There are actually quite a few more posts on his website about this subject.

Some tips for life – All the things I wonder about life in one convenient serving.

Types of Friends – If I blow you off, it’s cause you’re lower on the totem pole. Sorry. This is a pretty taboo topic to be writing about if you think about it.

I like the preciseness of the writing, probably because of my nerdy academic background. And I like how he goes right into tacking some pretty difficult subjects such as the ones in the articles I picked out. I may not wish to write in his style, but one day, I sure would like to be able to write with as much impact as he has.